Congrats Dhoni! Time for a Haircut!

Never beyond my wildest dreams had I thought I would button-down the following:
India won the World Cup!

What more can a cricket buff ask for than a classic Indo-Pak encounter as the grand finale? It was a magical evening. The mood was festive, people overjoyed, atmosphere gleeful, it was 1983 all over again, but only better. As it was getting increasingly difficult to believe the fateful scenario, to make matters more illusory, India won a nail-biter. World cup comes home, jingle bells!!!

We are all missing on one thing though. It was all nonsensical.

20 Twenty? Give me a fuckin break. Its not remotely related to cricket. Its a diluted version of a game pretending to be football for the need of a wider audience. The game which actually started as a 5-day event has succumbed to a 20-over format to cope up with today's world of 2-minutes noodles and frappuccino.

Any true cricket lover will rubbish the idea of 20-20s. The game is a delicate mix of vigor and patience. It required strategical thinking much like a warfare plan. With the advent of capitalism cricket got reduced to a 'One day' setting and we have gotten used to it, much like we are now used to breathing in alarmingly large volumes of Methane. But for crying out loud, don't abuse the sanctity of an already corrupt game. Don't make it preposterously inept. I am simply not interested in watching half-assed players wanking on the wicket with their clumsy display of swinging the bat randomly.

In a one day game of cricket, the match starts after 30 overs. The one with endurance and superior decision making wins. And thats how it should be, because, to get that extra kick, I'd rather watch football or pornography. Cricket is just not exciting enough, and should not be tampered with. The real fans will remain.

The know-it-all idiot

My usual pass time here in India is the TV. So tonight while surfing the prime time channels i uncannily stopped on 'Sahara One'. My stars were all in the right places i guess for i had the fortune to see Swami Baba Ramdev himself in all his glory and no it wasnt his regular yoga camp. He was lecturing about the booming indian economy, multi national influx, foreign exchange, the whole nine yards.

Fine. I dont have any problem as such when this ascetic fool cons NRIs with his yoga skills. Or, when he claims to have cured cancer and AIDS patients with the help of his "spiritual science". But for the love of himalayas, do not try getting into real life issues. A godman is to preach, and to improve the life that we would have after we die. But to tackle the present situations, we have politicians, businessmen, scientists

Getting back to the TV program. You actually would not expect much from a news channel where people say grace with the desi version of Sieg Heil (Sahara pranaam!).

So a sahara skinhead looking achingly neat and in awe of the swamiji interviews the man. After the expected criticisms to the churches of england swamiji almost made adam smith roll in his grave. Hereafter starts his inane drivel of patriotism.

"India is one of the greatest and the richest countries in the world. Why else do you think all these american companies are investing here? "

*A big jingoistic roar from the crowd*

He went on incessantly. The random roars encouraging him further and the skinhead basking in the glory of baba sucking up better than a vacuum cleaner.

Skin: "Baba is just incredible. I thought that he d be talking mainly about yoga but he s just demonstrated his genius by all this"

Whats wrong in all this? The gullible people of our country need a mere push to form opinions. Babas and booboos bullshitting them will have an adverse effect. We need people who are slightly more educated than ramdev(who skipped school after standard VIIIth) as leaders. If we stick to status quo, the future sure looks brighter than a thousand suns.


And a few words of wisdom for ramdev- Learn to shut the fuck up.

*All the quotes are paraphrased.